It does not matter how much they like you. It does not matter how long you have known them. It does not matter how kind you have been to them over the years, or how many dinners you have shared, or how much your children play together.

At best, your neighbors are indifferent to the impact of your renovation on their lives. At worst, and far more likely, your neighbors hate your renovation.

For you, your renovation is an exciting project that will result in a beautiful home. For your neighbors, your renovation is inconvenient, with far more vehicles than usual coming and going on the street; loud, particularly challenging as so many people now work from home; and unsightly, with a dumpster and often a porta potty clearly visible to all. For people in the city, parking is an issue that can inflame neighbor relations, as your renovation may block multiple spots on a street for many months.

You have the right to renovate, and many people build their attitude about neighbor relations from that point. However, if you are hoping to live in your home after you renovate, it is beneficial to you to approach your neighbors with kindness. You, not they, are changing the dynamics of the street, and so it is your responsibility to manage the related dynamics.

I recommend starting from the mindset that you are making the daily life of your neighbors worse in the short–term. Depending on the project, you may also be making their lives worse for the long–term, such as if you are impacting their views or access to natural light negatively with an addition to your property.

I encourage clients to remember that, in many areas, a neighbor is the most likely party to report you to the permitting authorities for any issues with the renovation. This process can result in immediate orders to stop work while the situation is investigated, a process that can be quite costly.

Good neighbor relations do not require that you are great friends with all of your neighbors. You may be in different seasons of life or find that you simply do not have all that much in common. In a renovation, good neighbor relations are not about forcing a relationship; they are simply about respecting the experiences of others. You do not owe anyone anything, and some people may still have an irrational response to your project. At a minimum, however, the goal is to help minimize issues, both now and in the future.

Do not underestimate the potential value of building goodwill with your neighbors before, during, and after your project. A few tips to help manage those relationships:

• Let people know about the project well in advance of the start date. One of our neighbors left all of us a handwritten note and a small lemon loaf from a local bakery before a renovation started, and this little treat was a fun and easy step that built immediate goodwill for a long project.

• Neighbors are interested in how the project impacts them, so in your initial communications, focus on sharing the broad strokes that they will notice in their everyday life on the street.

• You can share as many or as few specific details as you want regarding the project, and you do not need to share the same level of detail with everyone. Just remember that people talk, so beyond your close friends, do not share with anyone something that you are not comfortable with everyone knowing.

• Be sensitive to the idea that you do not know everyone’s circumstances, and a neighbor’s reaction to your project may be rooted in a personal situation. A parent of young children may be concerned about the renovation noise interrupting nap times. Someone new to the neighborhood may have safety concerns with the increased volume of people on the street every day. Other neighbors may be worried about how their pets may react to so much commotion.

• Whether or not you are moving out during the project, make sure people know how to contact you at any time with any questions throughout the process. Situations will arise, and being reachable and responsive will only help you to continue to enjoy your home after the project is complete by avoiding a build–up of tension with your neighbors.

• Ask everyone on your team to be respectful of your neighbors and their properties. Your team is a reflection on you, and their actions will impact what your neighbors think of you.

• Check in with your neighbors throughout the project, and keep people updated with any activities that will have a major impact on them, such as tree work or a large delivery that may block the street.

• If you are not living on site during the renovation, your neighbors can be great allies in keeping your property safe and alerting you to any issues of concern. You want them to contact you with those concerns, rather than ignoring them, which is all the more reason to keep the lines of communication open throughout the process.

• Be realistic about the length of time your renovation will take. Neighbors view the given timeframe as the length of time that they will be inconvenienced, so it is far better to overestimate (I recommend at least 25–50%) and have a project end earlier than your neighbors expect than to underestimate the time involved.

• Despite all of your best efforts, your neighbors will have been inconvenienced, and those feelings may not disappear immediately upon your return. Continue to thank them for their patience, even after you return home, and let them guide the tone of the conversation about your project. They may share in your excitement, but they may also need a bit of a pause before they are interested in engaging with you.

The ideal mindset is simply to think from the perspective of your neighbors, acknowledge that your project can cause them stress, help to minimize it however you can, and thank them for their patience.