The intention of residential design is to help ensure that home is a safe space for all who spend time there. I know that “safe” can seem an odd word to use in this context, and also that it means different things to different people, but beyond anything else, “safe” is the word that defines what I think the goal of residential design involving children, including teenagers, should be.

I disguise this point with parents by talking about “function” and “organization” and “storage” and “routines,” but all of those ideas are simply about how to help kids feel safe in their own spaces. In terms of my clients, I am not referring to a question of physical safety. I am referring to the idea of design as a tool to help children feel safe within themselves by ensuring the environment is suitable for and enjoyed by them, which can help them continue to develop with surety.

I am not implying that a house should be “turned over” to the kids. In fact, I spend a good deal of time talking with parents about boundaries in relation to general family space of the home.

Instead, I am referring to the idea of saying “yes” to kids as much as possible when it comes to design in the spaces of the home that are “for” the kids. Kids have very little control over their general environments and their routines, and so whenever we can offer a bit of fun or comfort, I like to embrace the opportunity. They want to build a fort in the rec room (a personal favorite activity)? They want to add inexpensive decals to their bedroom walls featuring a current interest? They want to create an intricate craft project on the kitchen island? They want to do a puzzle on the floor because they can see it best that way? They want to change their bedding because they grew out of color and only like neutrals now? All easy answers.

This idea is a twist on YOUR OPINIONS ARE NOT EQUAL. For example, if you offer a child a voice as well as veto power on their bedroom materials, you are more likely to find that they are happy with the selections made for that space. If you find that your child is indifferent to design, that attitude is fine as well. By allowing your children to have a voice on their spaces without letting those requests control the entire house, you may be able to find balance for everyone.

When possible, let design help you support your kids and their mental health. Let them have fun with it, whatever that fun looks like for them.