I did not grow up with pets and have not always been someone who loves animals. I firmly do not believe that having a pet is the right decision for every family. I am also not a dog trainer or a professional animal expert of any kind.

I am simply someone who loves dogs and has lived with them for nearly 20 years. I am also someone who has occasion to meet with people in and about their homes, and I developed the notes below in response to some of the most common questions that I receive about dogs. These notes are not about whether a dog is a good fit for your family. Rather, they are about living with a dog, and I am sharing a few practical notes by category and links to specific items that have worked for us for many years across several dogs. This information simply represents my perspective and is not meant to provide the answers for every dog and every family.

My main message is always that all dogs are individual. The only right approach is the one that is best for your dog and your family, and learning about your dog is the joy of having a dog as a family member! 

Please note: I shop at small local pet shops whenever I can and encourage people to support local businesses. We also order some items online and the non–affiliate links below are provided for ease of reference.

FOOD
Some of our dogs have been happy to eat anything in their bowls for all of their years, and some of our dogs have been very particular about food, particularly in certain seasons of life. When a dog is particular, we have had luck by finding the balance between offering them enough variety to keep them interested while not bothering their digestive system. What has worked really well for us has been using a couple of types of kibble (anywhere from a week to a month or a quarter with one type) and then using small amounts of different 'toppers' to make the bowls interesting. We like Bowl Boosters, Meal Mixers, a few bites of boiled chicken, some wet food (Wellness is a favorite), even a few small treats – whatever is enjoyed and is good for them! We always feed our dogs in their dog bowls in the same location in the house, and never from our dining table.  

SMALL TREATS
Treats are great for training and for affirming behaviors. They are not all equal in quality or size, or in how they feel on the (human) hands. Some of our current soft favorites are Soft PB Tricky Trainers and Zuke's Soft Mini PB & Oats; they are easy to break into even smaller bites. I prefer not to have the scent of beef / chicken / turkey / salmon on my hands, but we have used those recipes with success with our dogs. We also really love Pumpkin & Berry Fruitables (first received in a gift bag from a client, in fact), and we use a lot of treats by small brands only found in local pet shops. Trainers will talk about having everyday treats and high–value treats, especially when starting out, so we like to have a lot of options and values available.

KONGS + SPECIALTY TREATS + OTHER ACTIVITY TREATS
Some of our dogs have liked frozen KONGS with peanut butter, and all of them have liked unfrozen KONGS with treats or food. We have never had a destructive dog*, so our consistent KONG note is that our dogs have all preferred the slightly softer varieties, meaning the KONGS that are blue, pink, or purple. The classic and tough KONGS for heavier chewers are red and black, respectively. We always have bully sticks (of all shapes and sizes and types) on hand as our dogs have loved iterations of them (note that I never leave them on upholstery). We have also done many activity treats over the years, such as food or treats rolled in a towel or in a snuffle mat, all depending on the dog. Our dogs have never taken to a LickiMat, although I love the concept and have offered it. We avoid plastic toys, as they have never been practical for our dogs. I also like to put high–value treats into an empty egg carton or an empty paper towel roll, tied with a string, which is a great engagement trick on a rainy day.

HARNESS
The generally accepted note about harnesses is that they offer safety and security for walking, and good harnesses do not restrict shoulder movement, which is painful and potentially dangerous. We use the Blue–9 Harness, which provides full mobility while also being great for training loose leash walking. A lot of people also love Gentle Leaders; the style has simply never been a favorite of our dogs.

GROOMING
Good groomers are very busy. In 2015, I could call and get an appointment within the next couple of days; now, some groomers are booked two or even three months in advance. Once you learn your dog's coat and lifestyle, you will develop an ideal grooming schedule. For example, we have found that a full groom for our sheepadoodle every four weeks in the winter and every three weeks in the summer is the best schedule for all of us. A key note is to look online for grooming photos and/or to take photos of dogs you know; share these photos and any detailed reference information that you may have, such as preferred coat length, with your groomer. There are a lot of different types of cuts, and you want to be specific. We go to Bone Jour when in Washington and Something to Wag About when in Maine, and we pay ~$160–200 per groom, with tip (tipping is important).

TRAINING
I believe in positive training, not negative reinforcement, and we have done both in–person and virtual training; the latter is perfect for us. Our current trainer is through Calm Canine Academy; we have done classes and private lessons with great results with several of their trainers. Tails of Connection is also a strong online resource with so many practical tips and ideas.

CRATES
Crates are great for many dogs. One of our dogs adored her crate, and our other dogs have either been indifferent or did not prefer a crate. The key was paying attention to the needs and wants of the dog and supporting them. People often ask me about style options beyond the wire crate; the right choice is about the dog, most importantly, and then placement in the home. Styles include wire crates, traditional wood crates, modern crates with mixed materials, and modern wood crates.

ACCIDENTS
Absent medical issues, most dogs can be house trained with patience and consistency. In the meantime, accidents can happen. They can also happen over the years for a variety of reasons, so we still always keep Nature's Miracle on hand because when you do need it, you want to have it right there. We also are sure to have it in new environments, such as when traveling.

* DESTRUCTIVE BEHAVIOR
One of the most popular questions that I receive is what we have done to help ensure that our dogs are not destructive, so I have learned to share a longer answer to address this top concern. Some factors, such as an animal's genetics or the history of a rescued animal, are completely out of our control. We focus on what IS in our control, and the answer to how we have helped to ensure our dogs avoid destructive behavior is simple and has two parts:

(1) We have chosen dogs that fit our lifestyle in our current season of life; and 

(2) Perhaps even more importantly, we focus on setting our dogs up for success. From independent to highly social, from food motivated to not interested in treats at all, from laid back to highly focused, from joining our family as a puppy to joining our family as a seasoned senior, our dogs have had quite dramatically different personalities. In a fairly short period of time, each has had full access to all areas of the house safely. The key has been on learning about each dog and focusing on helping her/him to be a great member of our family.

For example, our current dog is sensitive and highly social; dogs with those traits can also be anxious and destructive when their needs are not met. We learned really quickly that he is very consistent in what makes him happy and secure: plenty of passive time with his people (we both have home offices), a lot of engagement with us (playtime and snuggles), a routine schedule with appropriate exercise (walks + adventures + visits to the park), and the ability to check in on his 'flock' at will (full access to the house). When those needs are met, he has no reason to seek out any behavior that could be considered less than desirable. The reality of life with him is that I cannot think of a single situation that cannot be immediately resolved with either a walk or a little snuggle and a bit of attention. 

Even with significant planning and effort, dogs can be destructive. The key is being realistic with your expectations and taking the needed steps to help your dog to be as successful as possible. I have found that a good trainer is invaluable to this process, especially for families new to living with dogs.